Split Household Chores Fairly
Assign ownership, not help. Ownership runs from noticing through planning, supplies, doing, and follow-up.
Inventory the whole job
Ask who lives in the household, their schedules and capacities, recurring responsibilities, current ownership, paid help, and the conflict that keeps recurring.
Use INVISIBLE-WORK.md to expose work hidden behind the visible final action.
Define done
For each responsibility, agree on an observable minimum standard, frequency or trigger, and any time sensitivity. Do not assume one person's unspoken standard is the household standard.
Assign ownership
Give one person primary ownership for each outcome. Assistance can be shared, but the owner remembers and closes the loop. Compare the total load by time, frequency, cognitive load, unpleasantness, flexibility, and each person's external capacity. Fair need not mean identical.
Design exceptions
Specify how cover is requested and confirmed during illness, travel, deadlines, or capacity changes. A handoff is complete only when the new owner explicitly accepts it.
Use HOUSEHOLD-AGREEMENT-FORMAT.md for a two- to four-week trial. Review the system, not a prosecution log of every miss.
Account for disability, care, age, and safe child participation. Do not use a chore agreement to normalise coercive control, financial abuse, or unsafe conditions.